Am I a Harley Fan? Yeah, I Just Might Be.

As a general rule, I have never really been a fan of Harley-Davidson motorcycles.  I have always had a preconceived notion of the “biker” type of person who rides a Harley and the culture that comes along with it.  I don’t know if that makes me judgmental, of whatever.  I’m sure it does, and I am sorry for that.

Having said that, I think I have realized that I may be much more of a fan of Harley-Davidson that I ever wanted to admit, especially after checking out the latest lineup of bikes on their website.  I have found my new drool-maker, and the bike that I simply must have one day.

I present to you the 2012 Harley-Davidson V-ROD Muscle.  Bask in it’s badassery.  And if you are feeling generous, have one delivered to my house.

http://www.harley-davidson.com/en_US/Motorcycles/v-rod-muscle.html

Reading List–A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity (Bill O’Reilly)

‘Bold Fresh’ is a departure from my previously-posted reading list, but it was well-worth the detour.  I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect when I started reading even though I have watched O’Reilly plenty of times on The O’Reilly Factor.  I appreciate his fair treatment of people from all places on the political spectrum and his critical approach to everyone on both sides of the aisle is a welcome departure from the obvious left-wing bias that dominates the American news media.  But the book isn’t really about that.

‘Bold Fresh’ is the story of where Bill O’Reilly came from, his philosophy on life and his work, and the origins and reasons behind his philosophy.  I could literally go an and on about specifics of what is contained in the pages of ‘Bold Fresh’, but I won’t, as you can (and should) read it for yourself.  I can say that after reading it, I have a much greater understanding of O’Reilly’s work and a tremendous amount of respect for him as a human being and as a man.

His fiercely-held belief in self-reliance (as opposed to the entitlement mentality) and standing up for what you believe really resonates for me, and I hope to live up to that ideal even half as well as he’s been able to.  O’Reilly’s viewpoint on holding people accountable for their actions is also something I agree with wholeheartedly.

O’Reilly writes extensively about his belief in the power and necessity of deep, meaningful friendships as an fundamental piece of keeping a man centered and on track.  I have done a fair amount of reading on this topic as well as self-examination and observation of my life the lives of the men around me, and I agree with O’Reilly 100%.  This is an area that many men (myself included) struggle with today; many of us have isolated ourselves from deep friendships with other men, and I believe we are all suffering for it.

All in all, I found ‘Bold Fresh’ to be a really enjoyable read.  O’Reilly’s philosophy lines up closely with my own, and the book has strengthened my resolve to live up to my own ideals.  People who already dislike him will probably not enjoy the book, as his approach tends to be somewhat polarizing.  But, for anyone who either already appreciates his style (or are neutral), go get this book and read it.  Today.

Kia Racing–I Didn’t See That One Coming

As anyone who knows me well can attest, I am a BMW fan.  I always thought they were cool as a kid, and when I was about 12, I had it set in my mind that my first car was to be a 1987 BMW 325is, red of course.  Well, my first car did NOT turn out to be the aforementioned 325is, but many years later, I did in fact buy a red, 1987 325is from a coworker.  It was an enormously fun car to drive and compared to the techno-wizardry in modern cars, was incredibly easy to work on.  Since then, we’ve had a 2000 528i, which was later replaced by a 2004 X3 3.0i, which is a terrific blend of sporty driving dynamics and cargo-hauling utility.  Anyway, given this affinity for all things BMW, you can imagine my surprise when I read that not only has Kia developed a racing unit, but that they recently took a first-place finish, beating out a BMW 1-series!

Don’t get me wrong, I really think Kia is coming into their own as a respectable carmaker.  We own a 2009 Kia Rio that we bought new primarily for our teenager to drive.  It’s easy to drive, has great safety features, a good warranty, etc.  I have to say that I have been quite impressed with both the build quality and the drivability of it.  It’s no BMW, for sure, but a solid car at a good price.

All I’m saying here is that seeing Kia jump into the racing world, and to come out with some quick victories, is not something I saw coming.

You can check out some of the details over at CarGuyDad.com.

My Long Absence

I realized somewhat suddenly that I haven't done any writing on this blog in the 5 weeks or so since returning from a trip to the Smoky Mountains with my family. For that matter, I haven't written in my journal in that time either. I believe firmly that there is a lot of value in a man being able to pour out his most private thoughts onto paper, where they can be captured, either for later review, or simply to give those thoughts and ideas an alternate location of residence.

I had managed to build something of a routine around my journaling and blogging in the month or so leading up to our last trip, and I need to rebuild that routine because it's just plain good for me. Not in the same way that exercise or eating vegetables is good for me, though. It's more like good for me in the way that being able to vent to a good friend is good for me. Besides, I find that for me, writing down what I'm thinking without thinking so much about what I'm thinking about is the best way to actually make sense of things. Make sense?

For the two of you who actually read what I have to say, I'm sorry that you have been left with nothing from me for a while. As I rebuild my writing routine, I'll be documenting some of my thoughts and experiences here.

Internet ID Plan Yet Another Example of U.S. “Nanny State”

Obviously, I understand the need for online security.  However, I see a couple of obvious (at least to me anyway) problems here.  First, I'm really skeptical of any system that can attempt to "make everyone safer", simply because this sense of security will make people complacent and not take responsibility for themselves.

But, the bigger problem I have here is one of fundamental ideology. Take away the pros and cons of the system itself, and you are left with the fact the the government is taking upon themselves to spearhead and fund this.  The liberals out there will disagree with me on this, but this is simply not the government's job.  It is yet another example of the U.S. government spending money we don't have on something that is clearly not a necessary government project.

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2011/04/15/obama-administration-unveils-internet-id-plan/?cmpid=cmty_fb_Gigya_Obama_Administration_Unveils_Internet_ID_Plan

Man Make FIRE!

So, I am somewhat ashamed to admit that despite being an active Scouter since my son was a Tiger Cub (he’s a Boy Scout now and I am an Assistant Scoutmaster is his troop), I have never successfully built a fire that didn’t require the use of matches or a lighter. I carry a magnesium fire starter in my pack, but I’ve never actually managed to use it to start a fire.  I’ve tried a few times, but to no avail.

To be sure, I have built lots of fires in my day. When we take the boys camping, it is often my unofficial duty to manage and maintain the campfire.  I carry a hatchet in my pack for splitting kindling. I even have an old walking stick that has gotten shorter and shorter over time as it has seen active duty as a fire poker. Everyone knows it’s mine and not to make off with my fire stick.

But, I still hadn’t built a fire without matches.

This is a lack of skill that demanded rectification. Being able to make fire is a basic survival skill that every man should master. So, yesterday afternoon I set out into the grand wilderness of my back yard, magnesium in hand, determined to not return until fire had been made.

I am quite happy to report that I am not still out in my backyard. I did in fact manage to build a fire using nothing but the magnesium, my pocket knife, and leaves and sticks that I found laying around my yard. OK, in the interest of full disclosure, there was one small cheat in effect. We’ve had a lot of rain and snow melt recently, so most of the natural material laying around my yard was pretty wet. So, to help things along, I did employ the use of a cotton ball soaked in petroleum jelly to get things going. But, I carry those in my pack also.

At the end of the day, I checked off another box on my mental list of manly skills. Now, let’s grab some hot dogs and marshmallows, get some friends together and enjoy some campfire time!

 

UPDATE: As I thought about this post, I decided that I should put together an actual tutorial on fire-building. Not sure when that will actually happen, but it’s on my list for sure. I’ll get Will to help me out with that.

Slow Down and Pay Attention

This morning after my shower, the air in the bathroom was especially steamy, so I opened the window to let in some cool air while I cleaned off the mirror with a towel. As I went on with my morning shave, I paused for a few seconds to just really take in the quiet of the early morning. What I noticed most prominently were the scents and sounds. The aromas of eucalyptus and menthol from my shave cream. Something about that scent clears my head and gives me a little boost first thing in the morning. Then, what really struck me was the sound of the birds chirping outside.  There weren’t vast numbers of them, but more than I have heard in months. And they weren’t terribly loud, so I would never have heard them had the window remained shut. They sounded as though they were engaged in a very happy conversation but didn’t want the whole world to know, just those who were close by.

It feels like it has been a really long winter here, but the sound of the birds was a gentle reminder that Spring really is right around the corner. A reminder that I really needed to hear. And a reminder that I might have missed had I not taken a few moments to slow down and pay attention to the world around me.

My wife often says that part of what she loves about the approach of Spring is that when you are paying attention and really watching for the signs, you get a sneak peek of Spring before anyone else. When others wake up one day and realize that, “Wow, Spring is finally here!”, you know that you have been seeing the signs for weeks.  It’s like a little secret between you and mother nature.

Today I really experienced what she means. Mother nature sent some of smallest creatures to whisper in my ear and tell me a little secret.  Spring is almost here. I’m just glad I was listening.

What Happened to Guys Respecting Women?

Recently, our 16-year old daughter posted a Facebook status that really seemed timely in that it fed right into a lot of what I have been thinking about lately.  She said:

“What happened to guys respecting women?”

This is a really interesting question coming from a teenager today, and the wording recognizes that there have at least been some guys out there who do respect women, but something has changed.  It also expresses a belief that while we have lost some of what we once had, we should try to get it back and guys should start showing some respect.
Even more interesting to me was the insight put forth by one of her male friends (you know who you are), who writes:

“it’s not that guys like disrespecting women, it’s that women seem to always go for the douchebag. So then guys become douchebags to get girls. So if girls want a man to be a gentleman, make him be. Don’t settle for less.”

I was honestly astonished by this level of insight. It gave me hope for the future of their generation that at least one young guy out there recognizes that girls are teaching guys how to act and that it doesn’t have to be that way.
I jut hope that our daughter’s recognition that there are good guys out there is at least partly due to my example. And moreover, I hope that I can model to my son that the right thing to do is to be a gentleman, because that’s what real men do.
I’ll wrap up by including my response to the whole conversation. I said:

“… It's easy to see why this happens. There are lots of douchebag guys out there that are getting lots of girls. I mean, have you ever watched an episode of Jersey Shore? But, really girls, are these the guys that you want?
For the girls, the bottom line here is that if you want guys to treat you better, then stop tolerating guys that don't. You show them how to be when you give the douchebags what they want.
And guys, it's time to man up and start treating girls like the treasures that they are. And I'm not talking about being whipped, either. In the end, girls don't really want that any more than they want a douchebag. I'm talking about respect. Hold doors for her. Offer her your jacket when it's cold outside. Stand up for her when others attack. It's only old-fashioned if you let it be, and I believe that most girls like it.”

What are your thoughts?

Reading List–The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)

The Great Gatsby is the second of the books on my reading list.

As I started working through what I wanted to write about this book, it occurred to me that I should have a focus, a fundamental question that drives what I write about.  Much of what I read and journal about these days relates to my journey to be a better man, so it only seems natural to use that as way to focus my thoughts.  Specifically, I am looking to answer the question “what can I learn from this book about being a man?”

If you have not read The Great Gatsby and would like some background on the characters and story, check out this Wikipedia article.

So, what can I learn about being a better man from The Great Gatsby?  The big one that stands out to me is the importance of having a close friend.  In general, the story points out that having one friend is more valuable than having hundreds of acquaintances.  When Nick is attempting to find just one person among Gatsby’s many acquaintances to attend his funeral (and is unable to do so), I realized that despite disliking and disagreeing with Gatsby in many ways, Nick was still loyal to him and was his friend.  Men could all learn from this that we don’t have to like everything about another man to be his friend.  We don’t have to agree with everything a man says or does to be his friend.  To be there, supportive and loyal, even when no one else will, is not only the mark of a real friend, but also of an honorable man.  I’m just grateful that I didn’t have to deal with the death of someone I know in order to have my eyes opened to this truth.

The other thing I learned about being a man from Gatsby is to not live my life based on anticipation of the future.  Gatsby’s whole world was built around his fantasy of what it would be like when he was finally able to be reunited with Daisy.  He wasn’t living to enjoy the now.  He was living in anticipation of the future.  The problem is that once he was able to be reunited with her, it wasn’t at all the grand wonder he had imagined it to be,  In fact, it started off a chain of events that ultimately led to his death.  He essentially wasted most of his adult life waiting for the future to arrive, and when it did, it was not at all what he had imagined it to be.

And so I believe it is with many men today (myself included sometimes).  We live today looking ahead to some future event that will hold the key to being able to really engage.  “I can do X when the house is paid off,” “I can start enjoying Y after I retire.”  Except that for many men, it seems like reaching these milestones beings nothing more than disappointment.  To deal with this, they may create a new future milestone, or they may simply give up and neither really live nor continue anticipating a better future.  This latter outcome I believe is powerfully symbolized by Gatsby’s death.  Indeed, giving up on having a meaningful life is an especially painful death all its own.

To summarize, be (and have) a good, true friend and live today.

Reading List - 1984 (George Orwell)

Prior to actually putting together my reading list, I had decided to read many of the books that ended up being on the list.  When selecting the first book, I looked for one that stood out to me as being something I should have read a long time ago, but for whatever reason never did.  Several books fit this criteria, but the first one to do so was the George Orwell classic, 1984.

For background on the story and its influences, check out the Wikipedia article.

As I started writing this post, I got stuck very quickly.  I found myself going back and forth trying to figure out what to discuss and what to write about.  I saved a draft copy of the post and came back to it several times over the course of a week or so, but I never managed to get very far.  So, to help me organize my thoughts and figured out where to go, I stepped away from the computer and grabbed my journal.  I find that when I put pen to paper, often what flows comes from a much deeper place than when I try to write electronically.

What follows is a mostly unedited transcription from my journal.  Please be aware that while I don’t really discuss much in terms of plot specifics, I still reveal a great deal about the story.  If you haven’t read the book, I strongly urge you to do so.

From my journal:

“I need to write up a blog post regarding my thoughts on the book 1984, but I’m having trouble organizing my thoughts or even deciding what to write about.  What direction do I want to take?  What aspects of the book do I want to write about?  What did I think of the book?  Well, I liked it and didn’t like it.  I enjoyed it up to the point where we realize that Winston and Julia have been discovered.  Not just discovered, but that their actions had been known all along.  Up to that point, the story contained a tangible element of hope.  Hope that the dire world around them might not always be that way.  But at that moment when we are made aware that their secret had never been secret, all of that hope is lost.  But even more that that, we realize that there had never been any hope to begin with!  For the remainder of the story, I found myself clinging to the hope that maybe, just maybe, Winston would be able to overcome.  That maybe he was strong enough, smart enough to fool them into believing he had been reformed.  I held onto hope that he could secretly still be waging a private war against the party.  But, in the end, Winston was defeated.  The system had won, and he fully submitted.  Willingly.  I was very discouraged by this ending.  I am an optimist naturally, and I choose to believe that in the end, good can prevail.  But more even than that, I was discouraged to discover that in the process of being broken down by the torture of the party, Winston and Julia had both betrayed one another.  And not just in a surface-level kind of way, but in a deep, profoundly selfish kind of way.  I hope I would be able to be a better man, but I fear that my own flaws would lead me down the same path.”

Overall, I truly enjoyed the book.  It was an incredibly thought-provoking read for me, largely because it conflicted with my natural tendency to believe that things work out for the best.  It truly made me think about a lot of things, from politics and government to the role of technology in our society to relationship dynamics.  And when a book really challenges your thinking, I believe that is the best measure of a great piece of writing.

Grammar, Spelling, and Punctuation in Online Communication

A few moments ago, I put forth a question to my Twitter and Facebook followers, and it only seemed apropos to pose the question here as well.

Is it really that difficult to apply elementary levels of grammar, spelling, and punctuation to online communication?

If you spend any amount of time whatsoever in the world on social media, it would seem that the answer is a resounding yes!  It seems that people largely believe that it is far too much trouble to apply those basic rules of grammar that Mrs. Finkelstein beat into them back in the second grade.  And if people (in general) believe otherwise, their actions don’t seem coincide with their words.

To me, this is not a matter of formality or tailoring your behavior to the circumstances.  I have heard some argue that social media specifically, and electronic communications in general are by their nature less formal than other types of interaction and therefore do not require the same level of formality.  I disagree wholeheartedly.  I do agree that there different audiences and situations allow different levels of sophistication in language.  However, that doesn’t mean that there is ever a circumstance where simple, basic grammar, spelling and punctuation shouldn’t be followed.

When you send a Tweet, post a Facebook status or comment, send an email, or submit a blog post, you are adding to a permanent electronic fingerprint of yourself.  Like it or not, how you say things often leaves just as strong an impression on people as what you say.  Leaving out all of the capital letters and punctuation from a Facebook status is the online equivalent of showing up for an office job with a wrinkly, dirty shirt, torn up jeans, and hair that hasn’t been washed or combed in a week.  It leaves a bad impression on people.

What impression do you want to leave?

My New Blog Purpose

If you've read my blog in the past, it was probably because I predominantly posted information of a technical nature.  This is still a large part of who I am, professionally.  However, I have decided to re-purpose my personal blog.  I will probably still write about technical topics from time to time, but for the most part I'm going to keep the techy stuff contained on the Aptera Software blog, rather than here.  The reason is twofold.  First, I will be posting technical articles to Aptera's blog at least once a month, and I don't really want to duplicate posts.  I used to cross-post technical stuff both here and there, but I don't want to do that any more.  Second, by focusing this blog on the parts of my existence that are not tied to my profession, I hope to travel further down a path of defining myself by something other than my work.

What will make its way here will be thoughts on my journey through life, with a focus on my experiences with becoming the best husband, father, and man that I can be.  It's certainly not going to be a how-to manual on how to live a good, because I don't really know the secrets.  But it will be my thoughts on lots of things, and I will be writing it for my own edification.  If others find it interesting enough to keep reading, then that's awesome sauce.

A Bad Shave = A Bad Start To My Day

I have written about shaving a couple of times recently (here and here), with the emphasis on the positive impact that changing this part of the daily routine can have.  However, this is a blade that cuts both ways (so to speak).  Just as having a really good shave can start the day off right, if the shave doesn't come off so smoothly, it can put a sour pall over the morning.  Today was such a day for me.  For some reason I didn't take the time to do it right and enjoy the experience like I should.  I tried to rush it and ended up hacking my face up a bit.  It was frustrating, and mildly painful, which just started my day off wrong.  I found myself irritated by pretty much everything that happened for the rest of the morning.

Tomorrow, I will be making sure to slow down and do things right, and get my day off to a better start.  I know, for those who have just always shaved with their Mach3, this still sounds like a bunch of bunk.  I can only hope that the more I write about it, the more men will be convinced to give the traditional wet shave a try.  When done properly with the right mindset, it can be calming experience that enhances your feeling of manliness and connection with tradition.

My Reading List

Having been inspired by a blog post over at the Art of Manliness, I decided to put together my own "bucket list" of books that I want to make sure I read.  Some of the books on the list at AoM appeal to me very much, and others not so much.  What I am going to present here is my list of books that I want to read.  As I make my way through them, I will put together my thoughts on each one, and I will come back to this post and update it to indicate which ones I have read, by linking them to my own posts discussing them.  I may also add to this list from time to time, as I read about or hear of other books that I want to read.  Some of these I have read before, mostly in high school, but I am going to read them again to make sure I have a more mature viewpoint and understanding of the material.  Many of these are very academic, and I may not make it through them out of sheer boredom.  If that is that case, I will still make note of my thoughts here.

The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)
Slaughterhouse-Five (Kurt Vonnegut)
1984 (George Orwell)
The Republic (Plato)
Brothers Karamazov (Fyodor Dostoevsky)
The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
The Wealth of Nations (Adam Smith)
For Whom the Bell Tolls (Ernest Hemingway)
The Picture of Dorian Gray (Oscar Wilde)
The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
How To Win Friends And Influence People Dale Carnegie)
Call of the Wild (Jack London)
The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt (Edmund Morris)
Swiss Family Robinson (Johann David Wyss)
Dharma Bums (Jack Kerouac)
The Iliad and Odyssey (Homer)
Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
Walden (Henry David Thoreau)
Lord of the Flies (William Golding)
The Master and Margarita (Mikhail Bulgakov)
Bluebeard (Kurt Vonnegut)
Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
The Metamorphosis (Franz Kafka)
White Noise (Don Delillo)
Ulysses (James Joyce)
The Young Man’s Guide (William Alcott)
Blood Meridian, or the Evening Redness in the West (Cormac McCarthy)
Seek: Reports from the Edges of America & Beyond (Denis Johnson)
Crime And Punishment (Fyodor Dostoevsky)
Steppenwolf (Herman Hesse)
The Book of Deeds of Arms and of Chivalry (Christine De Pizan)
The Art of Warfare (Sun Tzu)
Don Quixote (Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra)
Into the Wild (Jon Krakaue)
The Divine Comedy (Dante Alighieri)
The Hobbit (JRR Tolkien)
The Rough Riders (Theodore Roosevelt)
East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
Leviathan (Thomas Hobbes)
The Thin Red Line (James Jones)
Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Mark Twain)
The Politics (Aristotle)
First Edition of the The Boy Scout Handbook
Cyrano de Bergerac (Edmond Rostand)
Tropic of Cancer (Henry Miller)
The Crisis (Winston Churchill)
The Naked and The Dead (Norman Mailer)
Hatchet (Gary Paulsen)
Animal Farm (George Orwell)
Tarzan of the Apes (Edgar Rice Burroughs)
Beyond Good and Evil (Freidrich Nietzsche)
The Federalist Papers (Alexander Hamilton, John Jay, and James Madison)
Moby Dick (Herman Melville)
Essential Manners for Men (Peter Post)
Frankenstein (Mary Wollstonecraft Shelly)
Hamlet (Shakespeare)
The Boys of Summer (Roger Kahn)
A Separate Peace (John Knowles)
A Farewell To Arms (Ernest Hemingway)
The Stranger (Albert Camus)
Robinson Crusoe (Daniel Dafoe)
The Pearl (John Steinbeck)
On the Road (Jack Kerouac)
Treasure Island (Robert Louis Stevenson)
A Confederacy of Dunces (John Kennedy Toole)
Foucault’s Pendulum (Umberto Eco)
The Great Railway Bazaar (Paul Theroux)
Fear and Trembling (Soren Kierkegaard)
Undaunted Courage (Stephen Ambrose)
Paradise Lost (John Milton)
Cannery Row (John Steinbeck)
American Boys’ Handy Book
Into Thin Air (Jon Krakauer)
King Solomon’s Mines (H. Rider Haggard)
The Idiot (Fyodor Dostoevsky)
A River Runs Through It (Norman F. Maclean)
The Island of Dr. Moreau (H.G. Wells)
The Autobiography of Malcolm X
Theodore Rex (Edmund Morris)
The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
All Quiet on The Western Front (Erich Maria Remarq)
The Red Badge of Courage (Stephen Crane)
Lives of the Noble Greeks and Romans (Plutarch)
A Strenuous Life (Theodore Roosevelt)
Lonesome Dove (Larry McMurtry)
The Maltese Falcon (Dashiell Hammett)
The Long Goodbye (Raymond Chandler)
To Kill a Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
The Dangerous Book for Boys (Conn and Hal Iggulden)
The Killer Angels (Michael Shaara)
The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin
The Histories (Herodotus)
From Here to Eternity (James Jones)
The Frontier in American History (Frederick Jackson Turner)
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (Robert Pirsig)
Self Reliance (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

You Don't Need More Time

... you just need to decide.

Seth Godin posted this simple, yet extremely powerful bit of wisdom on his blog yesterday, and I felt compelled to share it.  I enjoy reading most of Seth's posts, which tend to be predominantly business/marketing focused.  This one, however, spoke directly to me on a much deeper level.

I constantly feel, and often say to those around me, that time is my enemy.  There never seems to be enough of it to get done the myriad things that need to get done.  Always in a state of being overwhelmed by the mountain of tasks and work in front of me, I am often unable to appreciate the accomplishments because I have to immediately turn my attention back to the never-ending supply of new stuff filling my plate.

Seth's directive raises one obvious question.  What do I need to decide?  Everyone who reads this and feels like Seth's post speaks to them will have a different interpretation and the answer will be different to each of them.  But for me, this question had two immediate and powerful answers that relate to two specific (and conflicting) parts of my personality.

First, I tend to be a procrastinator.  Even in the face of mounting responsibilities, I will often put off a task, particularly if it is unappealing or just plain not any fun.  Worse yet, in the interim time between now and when I actually get around to doing the thing that needs to get done, I might not be doing anything else of importance, either.  So, I must decide to do what needs to be done, right now.  Not later.  And regardless of whether or not I want to do it.  If it needs to be done, then I must decide to do it and take action.

Second, I tend to take on more than I can possibly do in a timely fashion.  I work a job that requires many hours in order to do the job well, I have loads of home improvement projects underway, and I'm an active leader in my son's Boy Scout troop.  And that doesn't include the time and energy required to be a decent husband, father, and friend.  The answer here was abundantly clear to me when I read Seth's post.  I must decide to only take on as much as I can realistically accomplish.  Right now, I have a backlog.  So, what that means is that I must decide to not take on anything new until I can work out from under some of it.  And then, I must continually decide to not add any more than I can realistically handle.

So, is time really my enemy after all?  No, I dare say that time is not my enemy.  Rather, I have been my own enemy by not recognizing the need (and the power) to choose.  I don't need more time.  I need to decide.

Mountains. Let's Go.

For anyone who follows this blog, you might have noticed that I changed out the header graphics.  I did this to more accurately reflect where I want to be, both literally and figuratively.  The image shown is from a photo I took on a trip to the Smoky Mountains last fall with my beautiful wife.  We expected the trip to be a good time, and we were looking forward to the challenge of the difficult hikes we had planned.  What we didn't expect was the overwhelming feeling that when we were in the mountains, we had finally come home.  It was a feeling unlike anything I've ever felt before; a longing to be able to stay there and be surrounded by the beauty and simplicity of nature.

Literally, we want to live in in the shadow of the Smoky Mountains, and we have begun the process of aligning our plans and actions to make this a reality.  We will most likely always have a residence in Fort Wayne, IN, as our roots are here and we have friends and family here, but we look forward to calling the mountains home.

Figuratively, the peace and simplicity of the mountains is extremely appealing to me, and having an image from that place as a daily reminder helps me stay focused on eliminating unnecessary stress and complexity from my daily life.  A simple example of this came from simply changing my approach to a task that most men do on a daily basis, shaving (I wrote it about it earlier today, so it's still on my mind).  But, it is a great illustration of making a simple change to introduce simplicity into my life.

So, the main image on my blog now prominently features mountains.  Let's go there.

Speaking of Shaving...

In my last post, I mentioned that I had shaved off my mustache, which is something that I had done perhaps once prior to that day.  Today, I'd like to expand on that a little, and talk about shaving in general.  Thanks to one of my absolute favorite online communities, I recently read about how to shave like my grandpa.  The article extols the virtues of the classic wet-shave using a double-edge safety razor and real shave soap applied using a real badger-hair brush.

I was immediately intrigued by the idea of slowing down for a minute and learning a technique that has some history and elegance behind it.  So, I ordered a Merkur Model 180 Safety Razor and a 10-pack of Merkur Double-Edge Platinum Blades from Amazon to get me started.  For this first foray into the world of the classic wet-shave, I actually did not pick up the badger-hair brush, or real shave soap, for two reasons.  First, I wanted to limit how much I invested in gear, in case I didn't like it.  Second, I still had a full can of shave gel and I figured I could just use that up.  I have since ordered a Swissco Badger Shave Brush and a tube of Proraso Shave Cream, which should be arriving in the next couple of days.

In the article I linked up above, Brett says that "switching from a cheap disposable razor to double edged safety razor is like upgrading from a Pinto to a BMW" (note: I have slightly altered this quotation to reflect my particular automotive tastes).  I have to completely, 100% agree with his assessment.  There is something of a learning curve to using the double-edge razor, but once you get it figured out, it's a whole different experience.  It takes more time to do it right, as compared to shaving with a disposable cartridge razor, but this extra time is part of the beauty of it.  It forces you to slow down a little and actually experience the process, rather than just rushing through it like we so often do with the routine tasks in our lives.

In this era of smartphones, laptops, iPads, RSS feeds, 1000 channels of TV content, instant messaging, traffic jams, endless meetings, and a million other constant, hectic distractions, it is really refreshing to connect with a less-hectic time.  Taking 15 minutes to shut out the modern world and do something as simple as shaving really gives me a sense of calm that sets the stage for being able to then tackle the challenges of the modern world.

The simple act of shaving the way our fathers and grandfathers did creates a sense that I am carrying on a proud tradition, one that many great men before me engaged in.  It sounds corny, but I encourage you to keep an open mind and try it.  There are lots of great resources out there on learning the techniques, as well as recommendations on what equipment to start with.  The article that I linked to up above is a great starting point, and in addition to that, the rest of the AoM community is a fantastic resource for modern men. Men who, like me, long to revive the lost arts that great men before us engaged in and learn to become great men that future generations can be proud of.

Shaved the 'stache

In my adult life, I have shaved my mustache precisely twice that I can think of.  Once was probably like 10 or 15 years ago, and the other was this morning.  Why do it?  Why not?  Curiosity played a big role in it, really.  Besides, it will grow back if I decide I don't like it.  So, far, though, I'm liking it.

So, is Verizon getting the iPhone?

So, the interwebs are all abuzz with talk of an official announcement regarding the iPhone's arrival on the Verizon network.  I know there are lots of people who have been either itching at the chance to jump ship from AT&T, held back by their love of all thing iPhone.  I know there are also plenty of other people who are loyal to Verizon, waiting for their chance to get their hands on iPhone goodness.

Personally, I don't have a beef with the AT&T network, so I'm looking forward to tons of people jumping to Verizon.  That'll open up some bandwidth for those of us still on AT&T.